I’m So Like You

September 9, 2006

A good salesman will try and get into your head, agree with you, appear to like you. He’ll care about what you have to say and insist that he wants what is best. He may even start to act like you, mimicking your gestures and movements.

Well you ain’t like me, motherfucker. Nobody is. You clearly don’t know me. Not even my closest friends have me entirely sussed. Don’t box me in, tie me up, put me down. I remain, deliberately, an unknown quantity.

A good salesman has one thing in mind: money. His money. And while whatever it is he sells could benefit you, you can be in no doubt it benefits him more. Some people make a grand old living off the backs of others. First it’s “you”, then it’s “we”.

If I want something, I’ll ask for it. Check the effort. Yours versus mine. I create things, you talk the talk. I can talk and walk all without leaving a nasty smell in my wake. Without me, you are nothing, because you can’t do shit. So, get fucked.

You can’t take it with you.

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3 Responses to “I’m So Like You”

  1. Andy Melton Says:

    You can’t take it with you….Cookie Thernbaum

  2. John Ong Says:

    I like to eat cookies.

  3. Andy Melton Says:

    You can’t take it with you, you god damned whore! *SPIT* Look at me, I’m spitting now! You can’t take it with you Cookie Thernbaum! You god damned bitch! *SPIT*


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